Dont Stop Believing

I have been moving around again, a lot. And this year it all comes full circle.

Last year, about this time, I made a wish for a place to stay for free. I did it again. And sure enough Berlin delivered right on cue. I am frankly enjoying answering questions about my life because most of the time it just sounds so absurd. This story begins: " So I met this guy at a concert and he offered me his place to live in for two weeks while he took an impromptu trip to India." There is so much magic here its hard to know where to start. The fact that I had just asked Berlin for help, the fact that my needing a place started the day after he left town. The fact that the place is in my favorite neighborhood in Berlin. The fact that the place is filled with good vibes and guitars. The fact that its been exactly a year since Ive been able to spend a little time living alone. The magic is really in the extras. And the extras come in spades making my doubt when times get rough, downright absurd.

Ive been looking for my "home" in Berlin. The one I can call my own. I have found that while I love to travel and explore, my soul needs a center from which to spin. And while I am so VERY lucky to have so many couches on offer, I would do well with some space of my own. So with all this magic afoot, despite my vacillation between personal exhilaration and desperation, it seems crazy to stop believing.

I have been taught all my life that "faith is the evidence of things unseen". Ive never been good at believing when it makes no sense. I like sense. Its something on which I often lean. But the deeper I go into this quest for self and life and meaning, the less "sense" is being provided. Something else is going on. And so I take a senseless stand and know that my home is on the way....